Selfish me post

I NEVER post about work, but this is the one exception, and it’s to allow my inner 5 year old child to come out and whine.

When you are THE administrator, YOU are the one everyone goes to to solve problems, to fix things, to buy birthday gifts for, and to organize promotion parties.

When it’s YOUR turn for a big “to do,” you wait patiently and hope that someone will remember you.

When news about Malka came down the pike, two professors left presents on the chair in my office, which was wonderful and very sweet. Everyone said Mazal Tov or congratulations.

Wednesday, I went and bought flowers for one of our professors’ 80th birthday. The week prior, I had to have everyone sneakily sign a card for another colleague who’s birthday it was.

I naturally have a “left out” feeling, which harkens back to being the “left over kid” that no one wanted on their team. As a stage manager, I’m TOTALLY used to having to take the blame when it all goes wrong, and none of the praise when it goes right. but it still hurts, and my inner child WANTS the recognition, dammit!

When I was going over my leave of absence dates with HR, they said,” Oh, when’s the shower?” I said I didn’t know.

Well, everyone that *could* have done something has now gone home, and I’m still here, training my temp. Like a little kid who’s mom forgot to pick them up after a baseball game, I just want to cry.

Truly, we don’t NEED a damn thing – dad and Janet are here this week, and it’s wonderful, I have a fabulous daughter, a wonderful, loving and patient partner, 3 realtively healthy cats, amazing friends, and we’re about to have a glorious Simchat Bat ceremony this weekend.

But Narda’s work got HER something, and I just feel all left out and poopy because my work didn’t do diddly.

14 thoughts on “Selfish me post

  1. I feel your pain…. I hate it when things like that happen. Especially when you are the one that typically does it all for everyone else! Grr!!!

  2. Selfish fuckers! You know what, it does suck, but at least you now know where you stand, and that there are people out here that truly care…..

    Hey, you should bring Malka in around “pooping time”, then change her on one of their desks-perfect revenge, I must say….

  3. they all just SUCK

    heck a card and gift card would’ve taken little effort and would;ve been appreciated

  4. Oh Shelli they suck. They really, really suck. I had a similar experience around my wedding….I’m a teacher and I kept secretly hoping they would do *something* before we all left for the summer and, well, they didn’t. They just didn’t. I was really a little surprised and extremely hurt and bitter. Then when we came back in the fall the person who does such things had a little thing for me (on the same day as someone else was being celebrated for having a baby and my event was, I assure you, overshadowed in every possible way) but then I didn’t have to feel quite so angry. I’m really sorry….I know how it feels.

  5. I think it’s fair one two counts to feel pissy about this. 1) Because you take all that effort to make sure everyone elses special occasons are recognised and 2) when you adopt I’m sure you feel like you’ve already missed out on a certain level of acknowledgement about your impending parenthood, which would make this shower more important than usual. *kisses*

  6. It sucks that they didn’t think of this. At least someone… *grumble* See you Sunday!! Can’t wait for the fabulous ceremony. *hugs*

  7. I totally feel your pain Shelli, I am the same way at work, always the do-er. If someone leaves, I throw the party, if someone has a relative that dies, I am the one that orders the flowers, a male co-workers wife had a baby and I arranged for everyone to chip in and get him something. Yet, since I’ve been diagnosed with Colon Cancer, not one person from work, other than my boss who is a need to know, has done or said anything for me like I have for them in the past. It’s disheartening, my friend Freida always tells me, that it’s Man’s nature to disappoint, so I try not to worry about it. Hugs Dearie

  8. Hi – (de-lurking) When my wife and I got married last year, my company presented me with gifts (and a check) and some extra time off. My wife’s office – nothing, which really ticked her off because she’s given to everyone else’s stuff (and its the kind of office where they throw parties for this kind of thing.) She’s planning to quit if she doesn’t get a baby shower when (and if) we ever have a child.
    It’s ok to be upset about this kind of stuff. Yeah, usually kind people don’t mean to be thoughtless about this kind of stuff – it still stings.

  9. that is completely thoughtless and completely my life. I am leaving my job of 4.5 years tommorrow and i know that noone has organised anything and it is me who usually does… sob, sigh, erk. My partner says it is just proof that i should leave…but sob, sigh it does sting.

    Whine away! I am with you!

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