To asshats #1 and #2…

To asshat #1 – If your dog craps in the middle of the street, and you SEE a woman walking with a stroller behind you, PICK THE SHIT UP. Don’t just roll your eyes and move along. May you slip on ice, and land, ass down in a big pile of dog poo left by some other asshat, and maybe you’ll think twice before being an irresponsible dog owner.

To asshat #2 – Yeah, lady, I KNOW it’s cold and my kid should wear gloves. Got a staple gun handy? because it’s the ONLY way she’ll wear them. But thanks for sharing your excellent parenting advice, because it’s obvious you currently do not live with a toddler.

Ugh. how are your asshats?

12 thoughts on “To asshats #1 and #2…

  1. Ugh- I know it takes a village, but it seems the only ones giving unsolicited advice are the village idiots! Clay gets overheated ALL the time in the car and in heated places. So we use the fleecy thing on his baby bucket whenever he goes outside, but we don’t put any coat on him so he doesnt end up all sweaty. The other day I took him out of the carseat, wrapped my arms around him, and walked into the doctor’s office (about 10 feet). Some woman walking past me started going off about having the baby out without a blanket or coat. He had a hat on and was appropriately dressed. Sigh.

  2. Ugh dogshit asshats. I have one around the corner. He walks his 2 little rat dogs off lead (illegal! and they go after MY dogs) and never picks up after them. So we go for a walk and have to dodge tiny little disgusting dogshits. If I can pick up my rottweiler’s mega-turds, surely picking up your little treasure’s nuggets shouldn’t be too much of a problem?

    And the drive by mothering asshats, you can get fucked. I know my kid best. I know what I’m doing. If I want your opinion I’ll ask for it. If he wants to wear back to front pyjamas to the shops, that is HIS choice, just as you’ve decided how to dress today. 😛

  3. Mine showed up at the food store today. I was waiting in line and this man came up, shoved my cart out of the way and said, “I only have one thing so I’m going to go in front of you.”


    You think that will happen when you tell me in that way?

  4. Yeah, we get the mitten one too. However, I have found that the best way to get her to keep her mittens on is to let her hands get nice and cold. Then she asks for them, and since it was her idea, she’ll keep them on. For a few minutes anyway. 🙂 Try telling that to an asshat.

  5. LOL. They happen in threes, apparently, so brace yourself. I was pushed at ColdStone by one guy who then spouted profanities at me and then admonished on a subway platform by another. One of those I-HATE-NY-moments…oh, wait, two!

  6. Ugh. Today I was at a fabulous eatery with the in-laws and the wee one. There was a counter there that had some poinsettia’s sitting on it. I plopped M up there for a second to give my aching back a break and some woman walks by and without even looking in our direction, louldy says “Don’t let her eat those they are poisonous!”

    I was all “Yeaaah. Thanks. Um. They are NOT poisonous, but thanks again!”

    They can give one the Big D (diarrhea) but that is about it. And really, did she think I was going to let my kid chow on a plant, right there in front of me??

    She shot me a dirty look before she walked out the door too. Pisses me off. Why can’t people just shut up?

  7. Yuck on the poop… and pass the staple gun on over- ME won’t wear a hat and yes I know it’s cold. Oh well!

  8. My asshats, currently are the people we had to get from a labor house since we had too much work for Fashion week.

    Who think since I am young, female, and their boss. I must not know my ass from my elbow…..

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